New blog

I went to the gym , did some weights and TM. I've been  using more gradient on the TM. Today was a struggle after the most boozy weekend for ages. no partying just escaping being at home. i was wondering whether i could confront my feelings enough to talk about my separation  here. i don't know whether i can as it seems to hard to even type the first letter or word or sentence. Here's a list of things that worry me, in no particular order. Fuck it, i can't do this.
1......................

where hall my speed gone

9 miles this morning. Comfortable and slow. Knee playing up. In a bad place

6 ms/9ms

9 miles wednesday/ 6 ms today.

Knee hurting

9 miles

yet another shit day at work. hard 9 mile run after

for the fucking record

I did 5 on monday and some pissed tosser aroound catford castigated me for going too slowly. he did have a point

gym/tm

uphill struggle....everything is an uphill struggle

sunday

enjoy, relax mantra on full throttle . Worked a little i guess. local 9 miles, leg held up. things rough at home , close to tears often. what am i going to do. Take all this away from me and i'm not sure i like what it left.