Why am i doing this?

I'm running the VLM for MSRC , a notable MS charity. I was diagnosed myself in 1994,  the year after I  last ran it. Touchwood, I've been very lucky with my sypmtoms since. Looking back I don't think i expected to be walking let alone running 16 years later, and apart from the fact that the information  was pulled from my spinal fluid i think i would have really started  to doubt the diagnosis by now. Still, we are where we are.  I do get tired and depression, another symtom, has been a steady presense since my early 20's so i haven't got of scott free. Training and tiredness is another interesting one, in the sense that i often ask myself whether the reason I feel shagged out is because i have MS or  because i ran 15  miles a few  days ago?

In 1991 and 1992 I  did my first lot of running as an adult, intially  with Stephen my landlord and then as i got fitter on my own. The old fucker couldn't keep up. As usual it was the fags via the canabis that knocked the running on the head  for me although i still remember a few runs from around that time, one where i pulled a muscle in greenwich and assumed thereafter that i would  never run again, what a fucking idiot. I rememeber one of two of the really rampaging ones, where you feel like you are flying and could do almost any distance; this is the hit that most runners are chasing and unlike crack and horse you can find it  again and again,if you are lucky. Around this 1993 time i hit the gym in quite a big way as well. In true John Cooper Clarke fashion ( Bronzed adonis), my idea of a heavy date was a hour in the gym   followed by an eight mile run. That said i stilll feel much the same way but  these days would normallly like the gym on one day and the running on the next. I was in pretty good shape though. I feel a  post about exercise and vanity coming on.